Blake drops me off at the front door, as he unfortunately has an important meeting to go to that he can't miss. We plan on him being done by about 3pm. I ride the elevator to the top floor and approach the handwashing station for the last time. Faucet on. Soap, scrub, rinse. Up to the elbows and in the knuckle creases. Under the fingernails. My hands cracked and cuticles peeling from seven and a half weeks of vigorous washing multiple times a day. Soap, scrub, rinse. The front desk lady greets me, and asks if today is the big day. I confirm, and she says she'll let everyone know.
I head towards room 3 and greet today's nurse. She's excited for me. I tell her that I didn't bring in any milk today, for obvious reasons, so she moves some out of the freezer to thaw. We have a whole cooler full of milk in their freezer that we will bring home with us. My babies are waiting for me in our little private room at the back. It's care time, so I go through the normal process. First up is Jensen. Change his diaper and drop on the floor for the nurse to weigh, take his temperature, change the probe from one foot to the other. Then I get to try to nurse him. It's difficult to get a weak little baby to latch, even with a nipple shield. He gives it his best go and then it's time for Everett's cares. Repeat process. Everett is difficult to nurse too, but he doesn't usually need the shield at least. I tell them that today is the day they get to go home. They don't seem excited, but I think they'll enjoy being with mommy more. When they are both in their cribs, I use the hospital pump. I'm going to miss that thing, it is so much better than the one I have at home.
The first person to visit me is one of the NICU lactation specialists. She checks to see how everything is going. "I'm going to call you in a week and see how you're doing," she tells me. She wants us to attempt nursing two times a day like we had been doing, and move it up as they become stronger. I am so grateful for the help they had given me over those last several weeks. Then the social worker comes and asks for the name of our pediatrician so he can get that information to my insurance. He gives us information about financial assistance if we need it and tells us to call anytime. After he leaves, I nibble on the snacks I brought. I'm not sure if you're supposed to eat in the NICU because I never asked. It's a little late now.
Three hours have passed and it's the next care time. Diaper, temperature, probe. We do a bottle this time. Nursing is hard work for preemies and they need to rest. Hello hospital pump. The next person to come visit is the NICU dietitian. She is a cute girl with red spirals for hair and freckles all over. She hands me a packet about nutrition for the babies. She also gives me a box full of human milk fortifier, that will be mixed into their bottles to help make up for the 10 weeks of growth and nutrtion they missed out on in my belly. We set up an appointment for a month after discharge to check on their progress.
It's 3pm. Blake is supposed to be here but of course things are running late. The nurses change shift at 4 and we don't have anyone assigned to us. The guy from the oxygen rental company comes to deliver Jensen's oxygen and show me how it works. I wanted Blake to be there to see that too. It's simple enough though so I can teach him later. Then the guy from the pulse oximeter rental company comes to give us our oxygen monitor. It makes terribly loud beeping sounds when the oxygen level is too high or too low, which we will get to enjoy for the next month.
The next care time comes around, and they were able to find a nurse to cover for us. Later, I look at the pictures from their birth and realize that she was there too. She tells me that her husband is named Everett and it's not a name she hears often, and that her maiden name was Jensen. So many coincidences. My favorite nurse, Angie, comes in to say hi and tell me congratulations. She gives me a hug and requests that I send pictures to the NICU so that she can see how the boys are doing. I can't say enough how wonderful the nurses were to us. Blake finally arrives a little while after she leaves, and the man who teaches infant CPR gives him his own private class so that he doesn't have to come back two days later to take it. Infant CPR is a requirement if your baby goes home on oxygen. I had taken the class the day before. After his class, Blake brings our stroller and a large cooler up to our room. This is it. It's time to go home.
It's 6pm. I hold Everett without wires for the first time. We put the babies in their carseats strapped into the stroller. We pile the stroller storage high with everything we can fit. The cooler full of frozen milk, the buckets and leads and tiny blood pressure cuffs that will make mementos. The piles of papers and box of fortifier that was given to me earlier. A tote bag with handmade blankets in it that they give to every baby at discharge. Somehow we fit it all in and our nurse escorts us out of the NICU. The lady at the front desk tells us congratulations and for the first time in their lives, Jensen and Everett get to leave the NICU. The nurse helps us get into the car and then we drive away. These babies are all ours.
We bring them inside and then the tears come. This is real. They are home. They are mine. My heart is full at last.
My parents and sister come over to bring us dinner. I'm starving because I hadn't eaten much that day. My mom sets up a cute little cake that she made along with banners and balloons welcoming Jensen and Everett home. My mom is awesome. My dad sets up our new Mamaroo swing for us and puts it in their room. Then they leave and it is just our little family. At home. Together.
Many people say the day their child was born was the best day of their lives, but for us, the day they came home was even better.
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