I have so many blog posts I want to write. Today, my babies were awesome and gave me an almost two hour nap, so I used that time to ignore the mess in the kitchen and write this blog post for you guys. You're welcome.
Breastfeeding is an important subject for me these days. It probably has to do with the fact that I've been nursing my boys for just about a year now, and I am proud of this fact. I feel like breastfeeding is the most wonderful and natural thing, but it really does not come naturally for many people, including me. There is a ton of work and worry that goes into it. Statistics say that less than 20% of moms in the US are still breastfeeding at 6 months. I really wanted to try to make things a little easier for some of my fellow moms (or moms to be) by sharing my list of random things I wish I'd known about breastfeeding before I had my babies.
1. Growth spurts might destroy your confidence every time. Many babies respond to growth spurts by acting like they are not getting any milk and are starving to death. This is very distressing, even if you know what's happening. If you aren't educated about growth spurts, I could totally see a mom giving up nursing entirely because they think their baby isn't getting enough to eat. Which brings me to my next point...
2. The ONLY way to know if your baby isn't getting enough milk is if they aren't having enough wet/dirty diapers and aren't gaining weight well. If they are fussy while eating, if you don't feel a let-down, if you don't feel as full as you used to, if your baby wants to eat all the time... NONE of those things means that your supply is low. It is so hard not to worry about your supply though. If you are seriously concerned about your supply, please go see a lactation consultant (IBCLC)!!! They aren't just there to help you get started, they can help at any time in your breastfeeding journey. Pediatricians are not trained on breastfeeding and shouldn't be your only source of help. Which brings us to...
3. Be prepared to fight for breastfeeding. Here's the honest truth: sometimes, breastfeeding is really hard. Sometimes it seems like it isn't working. Sometimes you don't know if you're making the right choice for your baby. Sometimes something goes wrong. Don't let these doubts get the best of you! Get help if you need it. Almost all of us mothers will struggle with breastfeeding at some point. You need to make the decision early on that you will fight for your breastfeeding relationship if that is something that's important to you.
4. The average baby only needs about 1-1.25 oz of breastmilk per hour. That means if you leave your baby with someone for 3 hrs, you only need to leave 3-4 oz of milk for them to use. I was definitely guilty of giving my boys too much milk in bottles. It was so easy for me to do that because I had a HUGE freezer stash from their NICU days when they weren't eating as much as I was producing (I donated a huge box full of milk each to two different mamas.) If you do that too often, you are essentially telling your body that it doesn't need to make as much milk anymore and your supply will suffer.
5. Breastmilk changes composition depending on your baby's needs. I was afraid in the beginning that I'd never be able to keep up with the demands of two babies. Surely, once they were six months old they'd need so much milk I'd never be able to make that much! But the amazing thing is that the amount of milk babies need doesn't change much after the first few weeks other than growth spurts. Instead, the composition of your milk changes. It is protein-rich when your baby is little to promote growth, and becomes more fatty over time to help your baby gain weight. Your milk also provides the specific anti-bodies that your baby needs, which kind of blows my mind.
6. Bottles and binkies are not necessarily a death sentence to breastfeeding. There might be babies out there who will completely reject nursing once given a bottle or pacifier, but I promise you that most of them won't. My babies were given binkies in the NICU long before they were even able to have food in their stomachs at all (they were 'fed' via IV.) The binkies helped them develop their sucking reflex. When they were showing readiness and after they were digesting milk well via tube feedings, we were able to attempt breastfeeding. It was a long, hard process. After they were latching successfully, we introduced bottles. Nursing is hard work for babies and preemies typically can't handle full-time breastfeeding for a long time. We wanted our babies home sooner so decided to allow bottle use. It took several weeks for them to work up the strength to ditch the bottles but we did it. So don't be so afraid of bottles or binkies that you don't use them ever. Just use them carefully (look up paced feeding) and nurse nurse nurse!
7. Pump parts need to be replaced often. If you are exclusively pumping, or pumping every day, those parts wear out and will lead to you getting less milk. If your pumping output suddenly takes a nose dive, it's probably just your pump. Don't panic! I know it totally stinks and is ridiculously expensive for little pieces of plastic, but replace those tubes and membranes often!
8. The colostrum (what the baby eats before your milk comes in) is so important. My NICU nurses told me right off the bat to pump and give my babies the colostrum no matter what my plans were for breastfeeding. As long as you aren't on any meds that would harm your baby (I was on lots of meds following my c-section and severe pre-eclampsia, most meds are FINE for breastfeeding) and don't have any other major health (including mental health) reasons for not breastfeeding, please give it a try. Even if you quit soon, that colostrum is so important for your baby. It populates their gut with all kinds of healthy flora that can impact their health for the rest of their life. Please please please don't give up without even trying.
9. You might hear lots of horror stories about breastfeeding. People might tell you that it hurts like crazy at the beginning. They might scare you with tales of mastitis and thrush and bleeding nipples. But, you might not deal with any of those things. I didn't! That doesn't mean breastfeeding isn't hard, but it does mean you aren't resigned to dealing with extreme pain and illness. (This also goes back to the get help thing, because if you're in extreme pain or bleeding you probably have a bad latch and need to get it evaluated.)
10. Whatever the outcome, you are amazing for trying. Really. If you try your hardest and are unable to breastfeed, you are still an amazing mother. If you need to go back to work and you don't respond to the pump well and you dry up, you are still an amazing mother. If you made a mistake unknowingly and sabotaged your breastfeeding relationship, you are still an amazing mother. If you have to stop to take medications for post-partum depression or any other condition, you are still an amazing mother. If you breastfeed for a year and then quit, you are an amazing mother. If you breastfeed for more than a year, you are an amazing mother. If you breastfeed until your baby self-weans, you are an amazing mother. I feel us moms are judged no matter what choices we make. If you have your family's best interests at heart, then I promise that you are doing exactly what you should and you are a great mother.
For my nursing mommy friends, what do you wish you would have known before you started breastfeeding?
I wish I would have known that lanolin is the holy grail of breast feeding. Both girls have nursed hard, i had bleeding, blebs and blisters the first time. Second time I applied lanolin like crazy and it was soooo much better; saved me excruciating pain this time.
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad you found something that worked well for you! I would definitely recommend every new momma have a bunch of nipple cream stocked up before the baby comes. Great comment!
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